


You’re Beautiful (James Blunt, 2006)

by MarmeLady_Orange



Series: MAGNET HEARTS [11]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: A Bit of Fluff, Alternate Universe, Break Up, Broken Promises, Cheating, Childhood Friends, Christmas Party, Drinking, Drunken Confessions, F/M, Flirting, Friends With Benefits, Friendship, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Out, No happy ending just yet… sorry, Slow Build, There’s almost sex, Unrequited Love, set in 2006
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-22
Updated: 2015-09-22
Packaged: 2018-04-22 22:19:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4852628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarmeLady_Orange/pseuds/MarmeLady_Orange
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Office Christmas parties can often be the stage for some unsavory indiscretions. Sandover Co.’s 2006 Holiday bash certainly lives up to those expectations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You’re Beautiful (James Blunt, 2006)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone!! I know this has been a long time coming but, you know, with the DCBB and everything, I’ve been having trouble working on this verse properly.
> 
>  
> 
> I can only hope you will like this new story. No more dealing with kids but adults (even though at times it’s difficult to see the difference)
> 
> Please do not hesitate to comment… I love to read just as much as I like to write! loll 
> 
> Or you can come and say hi on [Tumblr](http://marmeladyorange.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> Until next time :D
> 
> .

“So… Who did you get?”

With his eyes on the screen, Castiel kept on working.

“It’s called Secret Santa for a reason, Charlie. I didn’t tell you last year, and I’m not telling you now.”

“Unless you got my name, there’s no reason why you can’t say.” The redhead’s had seductive notes in her speech when she continued. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

This time, Castiel stopped typing and turned to Charlie, an amused expression on his face. “I’d rather not tell you. Only because now you’ll think I picked your name. And it’s gonna drive you nuts. Again!”

She pouted. “You’re no fun. It’s a good thing not everyone’s like you. Dean didn’t mind telling me who he picked.”

“Don’t care, still not telling.”

“Wouldn’t you like to know who _he_ picked?”

As sole response, Castiel gave her an unimpressed look and made a shoo gesture with his hand. Charlie huffed, throwing her arms in the air as she left her friends’ office. Not two seconds later, she sheepishly peeked her head back inside.

“We’re still on for lunch?”

“Of course,” Castiel reassured her with a smile.

“Great… I have to go see Zach but could you confirm with Dean too?” Charlie said as she pointed her chin to their friend’s empty chair.

“I will. We’ll meet you downstairs at one.”

“Thanks! See you later, Mr. Killjoy…” Castiel heard her sing-song as she walked down the hall.

“What was that about?” Dean said, already coming back to sit at his desk.

“She’s keeps pestering me about who I picked for the Secret Santa thing.”

Dean let out a soft laugh. “She keeps asking me as well. I’m this close to making all her emails go directly into the spam folder.”

Castiel couldn’t help but laugh at the idea. He turned to see Dean with a satisfied smile on his face.

“What?”

“Nothing. It’s just nice to hear you laugh. You don’t do it often enough,” Dean said with a warm smile.

As he always did, Castiel shut down every little spark of happiness the other man’s words had prompted. He knew Dean didn’t mean anything special when he said stuff like that. He was just being his friendly self.

“You’d be surprised to know I laugh a lot. Maybe you’re just not that funny,” Castiel still responded, unable to keep the flirty undertones at bay.

They were both in steady relationships – to some extent anyway – but still couldn’t help trying to make the other one uncomfortable by mock flirting. Which was worlds better than the first months of their professional collaboration.

It had been weird and distressing, to say the least. Castiel had even considered leaving Sandover because he couldn’t handle working so close to Dean. 

If he didn’t leave, it was all thanks to Meg.

When he went to her, his letter of resignation in hand, she sat him down to try and get to the root of the problem. She listened to him, patiently, waiting until he was done with his story to speak.

“Do you like your job?” Meg asked the second he was done, which granted her with a perplexed scowl.

“Of course,” Castiel said. “As I’ve just explained, my problem is Dean Winchester. I should have known better than to take the job knowing I’d be working with him. It’s my fault, really.”

“And don’t you think that if you leave, it’ll make him the big winner in that whole shitty situation?”

“It’s not like we’re at war. If you asked him, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t even know what you’re talking about. I’m the one with the problem, so I’ll be the one leaving,” Castiel said again, sliding the sealed envelope towards her.

“Look, Castiel… You’re doing a great job and if you hadn’t told me, I would never have guessed that you and Dean didn’t get along.” Meg raised her index finger so Cas would refrain from interrupting her. “You boys are the best at what you do, you’re an amazing team: proficient, and quick, and just plain one of the most productive teams at Sandover. I honestly don’t care if what fuels your efficiency is the hate you have for one another but I’d rather see you stay.”

“It doesn’t have anything to do with– ”

Meg shushed him again. “Your six months review is next week, Castiel. I know for a fact that we’ll want to keep you around and that comes with a substantial raise.”

“I don’t care, Meg. I cherish my sanity a whole lot more.”

“Did you hear me say substantial?”

When at the end of the day Castiel still wasn’t convinced, Meg insisted that they keep discussing it over dinner. In all fairness, the young man believed they wouldn’t be coworkers anymore at the end of that week, so he accepted.

That was almost two years ago. And for almost just as long, Castiel and Meg had been close friends… _very close_ friends. Which neither Dean nor Charlie approved in the slightest.

Thinking about Charlie forced Castiel’s mind back to the present.

“Oh, before I forget. Charlie wanted me to remind you about lunch. Is one good for you?”

Dean’s expression turned apologetic. “Shit… no, I totally forgot about that, sorry. I’m having lunch with Lisa today.”

Castiel nodded. For a second he thought about saying he should bring her but couldn’t do it. If he did, then he’d feel obligated to ask Meg to come too. Charlie wouldn’t appreciate that so much.

“All right, another day then.”

Dean smiled. “For sure.”

 

> • <

 

“Why didn’t you tell him to bring her along?”

Castiel shrugged as he swallowed his mouthful of noodles. “I would have felt obligated to invite Meg and I know how you guys hate her.”

“Hate is a bit strong, Cas. But thanks for that anyway. I prefer hanging out with her when it’s too loud to hear all of her gossiping nonsense.”

“She’s not that bad.”

Charlie raised a single eyebrow at her friend. “Really, Cas? I know you like the girl but you can’t be this blind. She’s a total bitch and I can’t believe that she’s actually HR. Pretty sure her friends know all about our business.”

“You’re exaggerating. She’s more professional than you think, never told me anything personal about anyone.”

“Yeah, real professional to date a guy she works with.”

Castiel huffed, picking at his ramen with chopsticks. “Better not say that crap when she’s around. She’s adamant to the fact that we’re not dating.”

“Don’t you guys go out a couple of times a week? Sleep at each other’s places? Spend Holidays together?” Seeing how Castiel nodded at every question, Charlie crossed her arms on her chest, satisfied. “Then you’re dating, dude.”

“I know that. It’s also my understanding but she still claims that we’re not.”

An amused smirk appeared on Charlie’s lips. “So what… are you guys not exclusive?”

“You know that’s not my kind of thing. But yeah, our relationship is kinda open. Except she’s the only one who’d think to benefit from it. Still, as far as I know, she hasn’t used that privilege… not yet anyway.”

“If it’s not your kind of thing, why did you agree? You couldn’t have been that desperate, could you?”

Noticing the concern in his friend’s tone, Castiel pushed his soup bowl aside and leaned over the table, catching her eyes with his.

“It has nothing to do with desperation…it’s just…I guess neither of us is ready to fully commit. I like her very much, but I know it won’t last. And she knows it too.”

“You’ve been hooking up for what? A year and a half?”

“Something like that. Which only makes me even more convinced that if it had been the real deal, we would have made it official in some way or another by now.”

“But– ”

“I’m not being taken advantage of, Charlie, I swear. I know you’re worried, and I know our relationship is not a conventional one. We just truly enjoy each other’s company while keeping our options open, I guess.”

 

> • <

 

“How do I look?”

Castiel smiled at the sight of Meg’s petite body wrapped in a black dress, her milky skin peeking through the black lace detailings on her arms and cleavage. It was sexy but not too much, which was perfect to attend the office’s Christmas party.

“Beautiful, as always.”

“Thanks… you’re not so bad yourself,” she added after letting her stare trace the lines of his body. “What do you say we ditch the party and stay here instead?”

Taking a step forward to take Meg in his arms, Castiel laughed. “Even though I love the idea, I think it would suck that some of our colleagues wouldn’t get their gifts because we were too horny to attend.”

“That’s right… gifts!” Meg almost squealed. “I like gifts.”

Castiel glanced at the clock on the nightstand. “But we don’t have to go right this minute,” he said as he dipped to kiss her neck.

Meg laughed as she pushed him away. “No way, man. I’m not messing up this masterpiece,” she said, swirling a finger at her face, “if I’m gonna have to do it all over again. You missed your chance, hot shot.”

She left her bedroom to reach the foyer, sitting on the bench to put her boots on. Castiel followed but instead of putting his own boots back on, he leaned on the wall to look at her. When she raised her head again, she quirked it to the side; something he wondered if she picked it up from him.

“What?”

“Nothing. I was just thinking how beautiful you are.”

“Don’t you get all sappy on me. Call us a cab instead, would you?” Even though she acted annoyed, Meg’s voice was warm. She grabbed her coat from the closet before walking up to Castiel.

“Let’s just leave the second we get our gifts, yeah?”

“Great plan,” Castiel answered before giving her a soft peck on the lips. “I knew there was a reason I loved you.”

The second the words passed his lips, Castiel wanted to take them back. Not that they were untrue but they certainly could be taken way out of proportion. And if the shocked expression on Meg’s face was anything to by, they had been.

“Shit…sorry…what I mean is– ”

“Shut up,” she softly said before crashing her mouth on his.

Thinking about her makeup argument from earlier, Castiel wanted to push her back but she moved away before he could even try.

“I never thought you’d say it, Cas,” Meg said, beaming. “I love you too.”

> • <

Like the two years before, Castiel was impressed by how lavish the Sandover Christmas party was. As usual, the company rented the reception hall of the nice hotel near the office. And once more, a reduced price was offered to the Sandover employees who would choose to spend the night.

Neither Castiel nor Meg had considered getting a room. Except Castiel’s slip up seemed to have given an excuse for Meg to find that it was a good idea after all.

“We both live less than fifteen minutes away, Meg.”

“So? This is a nice hotel, Cas. Pretty sure the rooms are awesome.” She hooked her arms around his neck and got on her tippy toes to talk closer to his ear. “Wouldn’t you love to just go up there and ravish me without having to clean up afterwards? We’ll have room service bring us breakfast in bed. Come on…”

Guilt set heavy in Castiel’s heart. He knew he’d have to come clean about his ‘love declaration’ sooner rather than later. Maybe giving into her pleading would make the pill go down a little easier.

“Yeah, all right. I’ll go check us in. Let’s just hope it’s not too late,” he said, kissing her forehead before going back to the front desk.

He saw a couple of Sandover employees already doing the same, Dean being one of them. Castiel went to stand next to him.

“So you guys are spending the night I see?” he said, seeing his friend busy filling out a card.

“Yup! Ben’s at his grandma’s all weekend so I’m treating Lisa to some good times. She deserves it, you know?” He looked up to meet Castiel’s eyes, a soft smile on his lips. “You guys are staying too? Maybe we could meet for breakfast or something.”

“Yeah, a spur of the moment thing. But Meg wants to have breakfast in bed so I have to decline the offer.”

“Huh… pretty sure Lisa would like that too,” Dean mused as he slid the card back on the counter. The clerk grabbed it and started typing on her computer.

“You want a room too or are you with him?” the clerk said without looking at Castiel.

“No…huh…I want a room too, please.”

Her eyes still on the screen, the woman gave him a blank card. “Please fill this up. If you’re with the Sandover party, please add your employee I.D. next to your name.”

Castiel nodded and grabbed the pen Dean still held.

“Maybe I should go back home to get my toothbrush and stuff,” Castiel said absentmindedly, mostly for Dean’s benefit.

“We do sell basic toiletry kits,” the clerk told him, pointing to the small store on the other side of the main hall.

Choosing not to comment on how expensive it must be, Castiel pushed the filled out card across the counter.

“Here you go, Mr Winchester, you’re in room 410,” the clerk said as she gave Dean an envelope with the key cards. “Enjoy your stay.”

“Thank you. See you inside, Cas.”

Dean left Castiel to wait for his own keys, which didn’t take much time either. “Here you go, Mr Shurley, room 408. Enjoy your stay.”

Startled, Castiel didn’t reach to grab the envelope. “Tell me… hum… do rooms 410 and 408 share a wall?”

“They do… is that a problem?”

“Yeah, kinda… See, we’re colleagues, so I’d rather not hear what’s gonna be happening in his room. Or him in mine. I’m sure you understand.”

Her cheeks suddenly scarlet red, the young woman started typing on her computer again. “Of course, sir, I’m sorry. Is the same floor all right or would you rather be on a different one?”

“I don’t mind about the floor, just make sure we’re not too close.”

 

> • <

 

Next to the plastic Christmas tree stood Becky Rosen, one of the directors’ assistants and head of the social committee. She held a wireless microphone in one hand and a wrapped gift in the other.

“Guys, it’s time for our annual Secret Santa. When I call your name, you come here and get your gift. Please, wait after I’m done with the distribution before going around to find your Secret Santa. And seriously, don’t open your gifts right away, okay? Last year, most of you never tried to find your Secret Santa before unwrapping the presents. It makes for a sucky game if you ask me.”

Some chuckles and a couple of boos answered the blonde, but it didn’t tamper with her excited smile.

“Excellent. First up is my very own boss, Mrs Sands. Come on down!”

The ginger director of sales was quick to come forth and claim her present. Thankfully, the distribution of gifts didn’t take too long. When Becky gave out the last one, most still hadn’t opened theirs.

“It’s now time to mingle and find out who had drawn your name. Have fun, you guys…”

Sitting at the same table, Castiel, Meg, Dean, and Charlie sent each other suspicious looks. Charlie spoke first.

“Cas, you picked me this time, didn’t you?”

The question made the dark haired man erupt in laughter. “I knew you’d think that, but no, I didn’t. And since you knew I wouldn’t tell you, did _you_ pick me?”

The redhead tried to hide her smile, but Castiel knew her too well. “You did, didn’t you?”

Now laughing, Charlie shook her head. Then nodded. Then shook it again. “I…okay, I did but…I exchanged it.”

“Why? I thought we were friends, Charlie,” Castiel said in a falsely hurt tone.

“Dude, I’m already giving you a Christmas gift. Plus, I needed an excuse to get to know a certain someone better,” Charlie explained, discreetly motioning to a couple of tables further. 

Castiel turned to see Gilda, the new receptionist, holding a beautifully wrapped box and looking around the room in expectation. He knew how Charlie had fallen head over heels for the tall brunette.

“All right, I forgive you,” he said, holding a plain white envelope in his hand. “I only hope this doesn’t mean I just got some gift card to the Gap or some other crappy store.”

Charlie’s smile widened. “I highly doubt it. Knowing who ended up with your name, it can’t be a crappy gift.”

Before Castiel could ask her who it had been, he felt a heavy hand land on his shoulder. He looked up to see Zach Adler sending a pointed look to every employee at their table.

“I can’t stay for long, so if any of you is my Secret Santa, I’d love it if you told me.” He held his wrapped gift in his hand, making sure everyone could see it.

“It was me,” Castiel said, making his boss respond with a tight smile.

“Castiel, thank you. Mind if I don’t open it now? I really have to leave.”

“It’s your gift, sir. I don’t mind.”

“Thank you, boy,” the director said, clapping him on the back before walking away.

“What did you get him?” Meg asked as soon as the man had gone.

“A bottle of wine, a 2003 Peyraguey Sauternes. The guy at the store said it was very good.”

Meg’s eyebrows shot up almost to her hairline. “How much did _that_ cost you? Couldn’t have only been twenty bucks.”

“It was more but I don’t mind. I’d rather give people something I think they’ll appreciate.”

“How much?”

“It’s not important, Meg. Just forget about it.”

The brunette huffed as she crossed her arms and pouted.

“Meg, the twenty dollars isn’t a rule, it’s like… the suggested minimal investment. Otherwise I’m sure some people wouldn’t even bother spending more than a couple of bucks on a gag gift,” Charlie intervened, sending the other woman a pointed look.

“That’s how we do it at the studio,” Lisa chimed in, not picking up on the tension between the two women. “Five dollar junk that we spend the whole night trying to steal from one another. It’s really fun.”

“You’re an artist?” Castiel asked her, glad to have found a way to divert the conversation.

Lisa laughed, making her look even more beautiful than she already was. “Not so much, no. I’m a yoga teacher.”

Silence fell on the table quickly after that. A couple of other people came by to ask if they were their Secret Santas, to no avail. It didn’t take long for everyone to get pretty drunk and silly. Which was the only reason that made Castiel think it’d be a good idea to explain himself to Meg right then and there.

Seeing people dancing in the middle of the room, he took Meg’s hand in hers and lead her to the dance floor. They were soon swaying to the music, their bodies glued together.

“Meg… I gotta tell you something,” Castiel slurred.

With her head on his chest, he heard her hum softly.

“I…earlier, I didn’t mean to say what I said. I…I love you, I do, but…shit… ”

Meg stopped dancing and stepped back a little, tilting her head up to watch him in the eye. “What are you saying?”

“I…I’m not _in love_ with you, Meg. You’re sexy, and funny, you’re a real firecracker but… ”

“But I’m not him!”

Castiel’s eyes bugged out of his skull. He didn’t need to ask who she was referring to. She’d known from the start how Dean had been a big part of his life.

“No, Meg. It has nothing to do with Dean, I swear. I’m…it’s all me, really…I don’t…I don’t see us together in the long run, that’s it. I honestly thought you felt the same.”

“Fuck you, Cas! Just… go to hell!” Meg snarled before walking back to the table to grab her purse and leave the room.

Castiel went back to the table where he let his body fall onto a chair, suddenly too tired to even think going after Meg. He looked around to find Dean to be the only one left at the table.

“Where are the others?” Cas asked, if only to say something.

“Gilda came by; she guessed Charlie was her Santa. And she too got Charlie, how awesome is that?” He looked around the room. “They went somewhere to talk, I think. And Lisa’s in the bathroom. So, what happened with Meg? She looked super pissed.”

Castiel shrugged. “I kinda told her I loved her. But I didn’t mean it like that. And she said she loved me too but then…yeah…I think we’re kinda done.”

“What about your job?”

“It’s not like we have to interact that much anyway. I guess we’ll see about that on Monday.”

Dean nodded then cleared his throat, pointing to the unopened envelope on the table. “Aren’t you curious to know who got you this?”

“Who cares? Pretty sure it’s a twenty dollar gift card to some place I don’t even shop to.”

“It’s not… ”

It took a minute for Castiel’s drunk brain to get with the program. When it did, he sent a surprised look to Dean. “Is this from you? You’re the one who swapped with Charlie?”

Dean’s gave him a short nod. “And it’s not a gift card. Not really, anyway.”

Now very much intrigued, Castiel grabbed the envelope to tear it open. Inside, he found a simple note card with a handwritten message.

_Cas,_

_I’ve been racking my brain to find a gift good enough for you. Then I thought about the car you bought from Bobby all those years ago. It’s falling apart so I decided to make it all better again. Even though it’s a stupid Caprice, she still deserves a makeover._

_Dean._

“Dean… That’s too much. Way more than the twenty bucks or even the fifty I spent on Zach’s bottle. I can’t accept this.”

“I know you, Cas. You’ll just let it rust and fall apart in your garage. I can’t let you do that to her.”

Castiel gave his friend a crooked smile. “So really, the gift is for yourself.”

“If it makes you feel better to think of it that way, then by all means– ”

“I was only kidding. Thank you, Dean, it’s a very thoughtful gift. Just… don’t go crazy, all right? As you can see, cars aren’t my thing so, minimal repairs. Seriously.”

“You’re breaking my heart, man,” Dean said, a little on the over dramatic side, efficiently making Cas laugh.

 

> • <

 

“What do you mean, she’s gone?” Charlie asked Castiel after inquiring where his date had disappeared to.

“We had a fight and she stormed off. I messed it up, Char, I’m an idiot.”

“You’re drunk, and she is too. It’ll all be better after a good night’s sleep, you’ll see.”

“No, it won’t. Told her I loved her before we came here. It was an accident,” Castiel added when he saw the surprise on Charlie’s face.

“How do you accidentally tell someone you love them? So she turned you down?”

Castiel’s shoulders slumped as he shook his head. “Quite the contrary. She said she loved me too. The accident was that I hadn’t meant it the way she thought I did.”

“Oh… but I thought she didn’t want no strings?”

“She must have changed her mind. But now… I told her I wasn’t _in love_ so… We’re pretty much done I think.”

“Didn’t you guys rent a room upstairs?”

“Yeah! I’m kind of hoping I can get out of paying that one.”

Castiel didn’t miss the excited look on his friend’s face. “What?”

“What if I paid for your room?” She blushed furiously as she continued speaking. “Me and Gilda… Well, we tried to get a room earlier and they said they were booked. We could go to my place but– ”

“No, please, take it,” Castiel said as he fished the key from his shirt pocket. “Room 403. Meg had the other key. She probably went to get her coat and left… I hope. So, you and Gilda hit it off, did you?”

“More than I ever thought we would,” Charlie confirmed before kissing his cheek. “I know office romances are a bad idea, but she’s…she’s special, you know? She could very well be the one.”

Castiel looked on as she ran to the other table to grab her new friend by the hand. When she showed Gilda the card with the hotel’s logo, her face lit up and both girls power walked out of the room, making Castiel snigger.

Right as they left, Castiel spotted Dean coming back into the reception hall. He let his eyes wander over the man as he walked towards their table in a not so straight line.

“Where’s Lisa?” Castiel asked as his friend sat down.

“Sleeping. We went up to…you know…but she was just so tired…she fell asleep.” Dean moved to the chair closer to Castiel and leaned over to talk. “And now I’m horny as hell,” he said, his breath tickling Castiel’s earlobe. 

Castiel swallowed the lump in his throat. “That’s what’s jerking off is for.”

“I want someone else’s hands on me. Too tired to jerk off anyway.” Dean leaned over a bit more, his lips now brushing the shell of his friend’s ear. “I’d like someone to sit on my dick and just… go to town, you know? Lisa hates that, she loves it on her back. Why do I have to do all the work all the time, huh?”

“Dean, I think you better shut up,” Castiel hissed as he pushed his friend away. “You’re a horny drunk and there’s no way in hell I’m making _that_ mistake again.”

“Come on, Cas. Let’s go to your room, all right? I won’t tell anyone if you don’t.”

“You’re crazy, Dean. I won’t help you cheat on Lisa.”

“Don’t you get it, Cas? You’re the one I’m cheating on. I’ve been cheating on you my whole damn life.”

If Cas had been a little less drunk, he would probably have laughed it off then told his friend to go back to his room. But his body certainly had other ideas as Castiel soon realized he had his tongue in Dean’s mouth.

It wasn’t until he heard a couple of catcalls that Castiel pushed himself off. There weren’t many people left in the room but it still felt like a spotlight shone on them.

“Dean, get off,” Castiel said under his breath when the other man snaked both arms around his waist. “We can’t do this. Just go back to your girlfriend, all right?”

Without waiting for an answer, Castiel got up and left the room. As he reached the lobby, he remembered that he too had left his coat in the room. The thought of interrupting Charlie’s sexy times made him shudder. Instead, he went to the front desk and asked the clerk to call for a taxi.

He went to the seat the closest to the door to wait. He kept his eyes closed, wishing the car to get there already. With the snow falling and this being a Friday night, he knew it would take some time.

“What are you doing?” he heard Dean ask as he sat next to him.

Castiel sighed as he opened his eyes, only to find his friend frowning at him. “Waiting for a cab. I’m going back home.”

“Don’t you got a room? Let’s go to your room,” Dean said again, landing a soft hand on Castiel’s knee.

“I let Charlie have the room.”

Dean’s pained whine tugged on the strings of Castiel’s heart. If he kept at it, Dean would surely win him over…once more. “I need you, Cas.”

“You need Lisa. And she doesn’t deserve this.”

“I wouldn’t be with her if you hadn’t started seeing Meg. I thought you knew that,” Dean slurred against Castiel’s lips. “Now I’m kinda stuck, you know? I don’t wanna be the bad guy.”

This time, when Dean kissed him, Castiel let go of all his arguments against it and responded with passion. Once more, they were interrupted, this time by the bellboy.

“Sir, the taxi you requested has arrived. Are you still leaving?” he asked, sending a pointed look to Dean who was now sucking on Castiel’s neck.

“Thank you. Yeah, I’m still leaving, I’ll be out in a minute,” he added as he pushed Dean’s face away. “Dean, listen to me. Go back to– ”

“I’m going with you. I gotta have you.”

“What about Lisa?”

“I’ll come back and I’ll talk to her. But right now, you’re all that I want, all right?”

“Dean– ”

With Dean’s mouth suckling on his neck, Castiel let out a defeated whine. Once more, the appeal of the Winchester had won him over. Pulling Dean behind him, Castiel almost ran to the taxi and barely had time to give out his address before Dean claimed his mouth again.

As the men were all over each other on the back seat, the driver chuckled. “You guys want me to drive around or– ”

“No!” Dean growled, sneaking a hand down the back of Castiel’s dress pants. “Oh, fuck, Cas… shit, you’re fucking beautiful.”

Dean’s words were like a cold shower for Castiel; he had been saying the exact same thing to Meg all night. He braced himself with both hands on his friend’s shoulders and pushed himself back. Dean let out a pained whine at the loss of warmth, making Castiel want to hold him close again. Still, the dark haired man made sure to keep his distance.

“We can’t do this, Dean. Go back to the hotel. Talk to Lisa.”

“I will…I swear I will…please Cas.”

Swallowing down all the arguments why this thing _should_ happen, Castiel shook his head, not even trying to clear the mist in his eyes.

“I can’t, Dean. My whole life I’ve waited for you, but there are things I wouldn’t do. You hurt me too many times before.”

The tremors in Dean’s voice almost made Castiel throw his principles out the window. “I’m soooo sorry, Cas. I know I was an ass to you, never deserved you. I was a dumb kid. But I’m not anymore. Please…”

“You cheating on Lisa isn’t mature, Dean. Just go back to her.” Castiel noticed they were now parked in front of his apartment building. He gave the driver twice the price of the run plus a hefty tip. “Just bring my friend back to the hotel, please. Nowhere else. Can I count on you?” he asked the man at the wheel.

“You got it, boss,” the driver answered with a smirk.

As soon as Cas stepped out of the car, he heard the other door open. Dean either hadn't understood Castiel’s plan or had decided to ignore it. His heart heavy, he rushed to Dean to make him get back in the cab.

“Don’t be difficult, Dean. I don’t want you here, not like that,” Castiel said in a voice he hoped was firm enough. Still, Dean slung his arms around Cas’ neck and started sucking on his earlobe. “Dean, stop!” Castiel yelp, pushing the other man back.

Giggling, Dean raised both his hands in a placating motion. He let himself fall back in the car. “Ow,” he yelped when the back of his head hit the frame. “I’m talking to Lisa then I come back to you, okay?”

Castiel sighed then crouched to be on his friend’s eye level. “Let’s do this when we’re both sober, Dean. If you still want me then, we’ll…we’ll talk about it.”

“Fuck talkin’… kiss me,” Dean said as he leaned forward, catching the other man’s cheek rather than the mouth he had been aiming for.

Castiel almost lost his footing in evading his friend’s lips. He swiftly stepped back and closed the door on Dean. The taxi left before Dean could open the door again, drenching the bottom of Castiel’s pants with icy slush as it did.

Except the sudden coldness of Castiel’s feet were no match for the one in his heart. Even the chill of winter shrouding his inadequately covered body couldn’t make him lose sight of the cab as it drove away. Until it was completely gone.

Only once inside his apartment, Castiel realized his whole body was shivering. The cold had helped get rid of the alcoholic fog in his brain but not of the immense tiredness he felt. As he forced himself to walk to the bathroom, Castiel dropped his clothes haphazardly on the way. Off with the shoes, suit jacket, shirt, pants, and everything else.

He was met by his naked reflection in the bathroom, shivering even more, his skin spotted red from the cold.

“I fucking hate winter,” Castiel stuttered as he turned on the hot water. 

It didn’t take long for the bathroom to be filled with vapor. Castiel was about to step in when he remembered how a scalding shower may not be the best idea. Reluctantly, he turned on the cold water to bring it down to a more suitable temperature.

Teeth shattering, he stayed still under the lukewarm spray, praying he wouldn’t be getting sick. It took about twenty minutes for Castiel’s blood to flow freely in his body again. To some extent anyway.

A fleeting thought about what could have been happening only minutes ago did make some of the blood divert south of the border. Castiel gave his dick a lazy tug, only to find that if the images were there, the energy certainly wasn’t.

“And I fucking hate Dean Winchester,” he said again.

But he knew that had to be the biggest lie he’s ever told anyone, himself included.

 

> • <

 

“Wake up, sleepy head,” Castiel heard a familiar voice say. At the same time, a well-known body had curled up around his own. A naked body…

“Meg?” Castiel said in a hum.

“Morning, baby!” the brunette confirmed before latching her lips onto his neck.

Basking in the familiarity, Castiel let Meg kiss and caress him, letting his own hands travel all over her. For some reason, it was when he found the wetness between her legs that the night before exploded in Castiel’s mind. He pushed her away to sit himself up.

“Shit…Meg…what are you doing here? I thought you– ”

“You thought I was mad at you? I was, or I thought I was.” Meg rose up to her knees and came to straddle one of Castiel’s thighs. “I think I was mostly caught off guard. I don’t care if you’re not in love with me. We can still fuck…”

“Meg,” Castiel said as he delicately took her off of him, “I don’t think we should. It’s unfair to me, and it’s unfair to you.”

A crooked smile appeared on the woman’s face but her stare certainly wasn’t amused. “How can us hooking up be unfair? We’ve been doing this shit for more than a year. What changed?”

“Look… You deserve, we both deserve, to find love. The real thing, you know?”

“Didn’t take you to be so much of a sap, Clarence.”

Castiel felt the guilt creep up his spine at the pet name. She didn’t use it often but when she did, it usually meant she was pissed at him.

“He’ll never love you like you want him to. I hope you knew that by now.”

Again, Castiel knew who she was referring to. “This has nothing to do with Dean.” Not at first anyway, he specified in his own mind. “I’m sorry if I hurt you, Meg, I never wanted that. I’ve known for a long time that we weren’t meant to be. Maybe I should have– ”

“Yeah… maybe you should have done this, and maybe you should have done that. It’s too late now, ain’t it?”

Meg got off the bed and picked her clothes from the floor. Castiel wasn’t surprised to see her put yesterday’s dress back on. And now that she was further away, he could see how she hadn’t even bothered cleaning off her makeup. There were faint streaks of black on her cheeks, where her mascara and liner had run.

“I’m so sorry, Meg,” Castiel said again, even though he knew it wouldn’t help.

As a sole answer, the brunette glared at him before leaving the room. Not a minute later, Castiel heard the front door slam shut.

Out of habit, Castiel extended a hand to grab his phone from the bedside table, to no avail.

“Shit,” he murmured, wondering how late it could be. The sun did seem to be a bit high already so Castiel got up. He found the phone in his pants which were still were he had gotten rid of them the night before. Three text message and one missed call were waiting for him.

**_Meg:_ ** _U home baby?_

**_Meg:_ ** _Coming over_

**_Charlie:_ ** _Thanks for the room, Cas. We had a blast. Call me later._

The missed call was from Meg as well. Nothing from Dean.

As he prepared some coffee, Castiel couldn’t help but let his mind wander, fantasize. Would Dean call or would he just show up so they could resume where they had left off?

The answer came as he was sipping on his second coffee. Castiel almost dropped the cup when there was a knock on his door. On the other side, a Dean looking not so fresh, him too wearing the same clothes as the day before.

“Come in,” Castiel simply said as he tried to pull Dean inside.

“I…I can’t stay, Cas,” he said, as if afraid to pass the threshold. He casted his eyes down before speaking again. “Look…I…I really meant what I said yesterday. It’s just…the timing’s off…and there’s the kid.”

“He’s not yours,” Castiel spat.

This time, Dean looked up, landing a wet stare on Castiel. “I know that. But I kinda love the kid, and he kinda loves me too, you know? It’s just…Jesus, Cas…I’m so sorry. I’d rather be with you but– ”

“I get it. I don’t know why I thought this time would ever be any different.” With his arms crossed over his chest, Castiel took a confrontational step forward. “I’ve been down this road too many times already. Whatever you’re trying to sell, I’m not buying anymore, Dean. We’re done, you hear? Done!”

“Cas, please…”

“Just go,” Castiel said, his voice nothing more than a low growl.

But instead of obeying, Dean closed the distance between them to crash his mouth onto Castiel’s. Before Cas could move away, Dean grabbed his face in his hands to keep him close. Against everything he believed in, Castiel found himself relaxing in his friend’s hold.

Soon, Dean let his mouth go and moved his arms to grab Castiel in the mother of all hugs.

“Me and Lisa, we’re kinda over already, you know?” Dean murmured next to Castiel’s ear, making him shiver. “The room was supposed to be some way for us to reconnect. But nothing’s working, Cas. She wants us to see a counsellor but I won’t do that. Not if you want me. I promise I’ll leave her just… not right now. Ben deserves a nice Christmas.”

“Then you’ll leave?”

“I’ll leave… What do you say we make plans for New Year? Just you and me, start off 2007 with a bang.”

Both men chuckled but Dean’s laugh didn’t last long, ending in a sigh. “I’ll make it up to you, Cas… I swear I will,” he said before landing a soft kiss on Castiel’s lips.

At war with himself, Castiel didn’t answer. Even though he hoped with all his heart that Dean’s words were true, Cas had been badly burned before. Still, he wrapped Dean in a tight hug.

“Don’t make promises, Dean. Not until you actually can keep them.”

Understanding, Dean nodded and gave him one last kiss to his temple.

“2007,” he promised into Castiel’s ear before leaving.

 

> • <

 

Castiel wasn’t surprised when 2007 came with him alone binging on cheeze puffs while he watched the ball drop in Times Square.

Except this time, he couldn’t think of being bitter about Dean going back on his word. Not with how things unfolded. He certainly couldn’t resent the man for choosing to stay with his girlfriend after she found out she had cancer.

Could he?

 

 

. 

**Author's Note:**

> I truly hope I’ll be able to conclude it all BEFORE the end of the year. The way I see it, there should only be two (or three) more instalments to go: two (or three) before you all get the happy ending I’ve been promising for so long.
> 
> Because it WILL be happy. That is a promise (and I’m not like Dean… I do keep my promises! ;) Even if it takes a while…)
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading my sweets!!


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